As women, we grow up being taught that we need to act a certain way. We have to play small and be small in order to fit into a mold that is the ‘norm’ society expects.

We often leave so much of who we truly are on a shelf tied up with a pretty bow, in hopes that someday we will get back to what we always wanted for ourselves.

“Maybe someday”, we say. But for now, I will follow the flow and fall into line.

Expectations

There are expectations that we have to give up pieces of ourselves in order to be who we are told we need to be.

I was that woman. Giving up so much of who I was so that I could have the life that society praised and made to look like we just had to have.

I talk to so many women who feel the same way. They wake up one day and they don’t recognize themselves. Time and years go by, and they feel lost and fall into this funk that they cannot explain.

“How did I get here?” they ask
“I don’t really know what I want or who I am anymore!” they exclaim with sorrow.

Guilt and Fear

The guilt feels so heavy, that they bottle it up. Guilt that tells them that other people need them to be the way they are, so making a change is a bad thing.
Our loved ones may talk us out of bringing our ideas to life, because the thought of change scares them. Fearful that because you make a change, it means their lives will be shaken somehow.

If only people understood that the happier you are, the better their lives would be too! But that’s another blog post altogether.

We assume these roles as mother, partner, take on a position in a career that maybe we have outgrown, but are too afraid to ask for more.

Women give up so much of what they want and need. Not to say that being a mom and a partner and working in a career is a bad thing. It’s just that so many of us don’t allow ourselves to bring all of who we are into these important roles in our lives, so we end up playing small.

Silently, our light diminishes and we end up feeling alone in our own world.

The way back to you is with curiosity.

What if there was a way to become curious without the heaviness of expectations?
What if we just allowed ourselves to become positively welcoming to what more we could have that is genuinely a part of who we are without all of the guilt that crushes our soul?

The short answer to all of this is… as long as you are curious about what is possible for you, you will figure out how to get back to YOU.

Curiosity is not a ‘commitment’ to anything. I like to consider it as a playful exploration.

When we let our guard down enough, we can actually allow some of those parts of us that made us who we really are to come to the surface instead of suppressing and hiding it.

It brings little lights of inspiration that open us up to more than what is keeping us held down into our ‘roles’.

May I remind you (and myself) that we are individuals with all kinds of special and unique gifts!

Here are some questions I would like to invite you to ponder and journal about.

• What makes you light up inside when you think about an interest, a hobby, or something that you used to do, but gave up?
• What do you deny yourself over and over again because it feels “selfish” to indulge in? (HINT: If it keeps coming up for you, then maybe it’s time to get curious about it again.)

You were once a playful and carefree soul. Isn’t it time to reconnect to her again?

Looking for a little support to get you started? I invite you to a free consultation that will help you on your path to finding your own version of success. Use this link to book your free, no-obligation consultation today: Let’s Chat

Want more resources? Check out more tools available for you: https://www.caroleblackburn-lifecoach.com/tools/

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